I was late for work again yesterday. I woke up for subuh, saw Hadi off to school (he'll be in Sarimbun camp for the P5 National Day Camp, and will return only on Wednesday. I'm missing my boy...), did some reading, then tidur balik. Then, bangun terlambat, at 8.20am. Instead of rushing, ntah tak tahu what made me feel like I have all the time in the world.. I took my own sweet time. By the time I left home, it was nearly 9am. Then I was angry at myself for taking my time. I knew I was going to reach office at 920 at least! Drove faster than usual. I found that I can actually reach office in approximately 16 mins at that speed. But I shouldn't make that a habit. In the car, me and my bad mood, was asking myself.. 'what is wrong with me?!?!' I knew I was going to be late, I DON'T want to be late, then why the tuna fish did I take my time????' Langsung tak faham!
Walked into the office. Now, jam kat office ni pulak cepat 3-4 minit.. lagi lah terserlah kelambatan aku ni. Until now, nobody has commented or said anything about my tardiness. But I really better start coming in on time MOST of the time, before someone opens their mouth about it.. then that would make me feel even worse. I want to change on my own accord! (BUT then, as a case for myself, I always stay back at least, as late as I come in, to pay back lah gitu. Plus, i don't go out for breakfast. Ok.. ok, but still,..)
Why ah? Why the complacency even though the consequences are clear. And we're not even talking about something 'ghaib' It's something I OBVIOUSLY know. E.g. simple thing like : MUST leave home by 835am, else LATE!
Agaknya gini lah kita, kebanyakan manusia.. sometimes dah tahu betul akibatnya, but somehow we think we can JUST get away with it. You know, like MATI.. DEATH.. of course we all know we will all die one day. Could be in 10 years time, could be tomorrow or even today. But what are we doing??
Anyway, I was not in a good mood and dissappointed with myself for being sooooo not firm. My lunch partner, suggested that I set an alarm clock to go off about 10 mins before I'm suppose to leave home. It sounded like a good idea, tapi after thinking it over, I don't think it's the alarm clock. It's not that I don't know the time.. It's just that I have to be firm, lawan si setan, a'duwwun mubin ni.
Well, THIS morning, despite sleeping super late last night, I managed to wake up early, and got ready early, alhamdulillah. Actually I get ready early on other mornings too, but then I start checking emails, talk to the children, sarapan.. like nobody's business, and THEN I'm late. And, today also, I turned on my laptop.. but I stopped myself. Told myself.. "Eh! don't fall into this stupid trap again!" And I turned off the machine! Satu lagi mini kejayaan! Alhamdulillah. I left home 835am and reached office at 8.59am. Yeay!! =D
NOW............ to keep it up.
InsyaAllah.
