For the last two years, when people ask me how old I am, I always answer them "..going to be 40 soon." I've been 'looking forward' to being 40 since about 2 years ago. I think it's more of, trying to convince myself that YES, me.. I AM turning 40 soon. I am actually getting old. Although I always don't feel as old, thanks to my children and the mostly younger fun friends that I have. I always have to remind myself I'm THAT old.
Being older has also made me thought about death even more frequently. Yes, you can die anytime, but the odds are of course higher as you get older. I'm wondering what I'll experience after death. I also wonder sometimes, what I'll do in Heaven (insyaAllah, i pray that I get there!). What does one do, when they don't have to work and everything they want is there? I wonder how bliss will come. Of course, we CAN'T ever imagine how it'll be.. but still I wonder sometimes. And I pray that our family and friends will re-unite there.
What do I hope for in my life after 40? I hope my iman and taqwa will grow. I hope I can still be as attractive to my husband as I probably was, when I was younger. Maybe attractive in a different way, a cooler kind of way? I hope I can make a positive contribution and difference to someone's life, especially my children. I hope I can become more wise in making my decisions and in giving advice to others. I hope I can still have some fun. I hope my life on earth will not go to waste. Speaking of which.. I think I'll go read a book.
4 comments:
i still remember asking "how young are you?" =D
Ya ke? I also remember wondering if it was some kind of a compliment or sarcasm.. =D
hairil!!! tahun ni!! 2-3 moons more.. ;)
Welcome to the 40s club Erni =)
Well, I touched 40 years ago and will be 45 come 23 January but like you I also do not feel as old as my age..heh...heh. But I keep myself grounded and I am not hesitant in any way to let people know my real age and I feel good to be older and hopefully wiser as the years roll by. Thoughts of death are always consistently there of course and Yes, aspirations for Jannah too.
Live life as it should be lived and stay happy and positive always =)
i'll be 40 in october, this year... have been looking forward, since last year. hope it will be nice :)
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